I call this "The Man Rules"

After 2 months of being married, I think it's about time for me to do a report on how I learnt to deal with my "wonderful husband" Harry.
Our married life will be so sweet and happy if we all follow the rules, but since my rules seem to be more like guidelines, I had no choice but to follow this set of rules,

I call this "The Man Rules"

Rule No.1. Men are NOT mind readers.
(FIRST & FOREMOST RULE)

Rule No.1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it Down.

Rule No.1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

Rule No.1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

Rule No.1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

Rule No.1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

Rule No.1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

Rule No.1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

Rule No.1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both. If you already know best how to do it , just do it yourself.

Rule No.1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials...

Rule No.1. Captain Cook did NOT need directions and neither do we.

Rule No.1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

Rule No.1. If it itches, it will be scratched.

Rule No.1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

Rule No.1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

Rule No.1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

Rule No.1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics
AS Football or Cars.

Rule No.1. You have enough clothes.

Rule No.1. You have too many shoes.

Rule No.1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

Now, you might noticed that these rules are all addressed as Rule No.1
That's because in men's world these are all number "1 " Rules!

Vicky Lee Roff