Friday, February 10

my first blog

Marianne recently suggested that my life has 'stagnated'. Contrary to the supporting evidence, I would like to state that I am in 'transition'. And since this transitional period does not involve too much of anythying, I have time to send and receive silly emails like the following. It was sent to me by Giant football fanatic from Cork, Ireland.
for girls...

You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till. Behind the shop assistant on the till is a pair of shoes, which you must have.

The female shopper in front of you has seen them also and is eyeing them with desire. Both of you have forgotten your purses. It would be totally rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes.

The shop assistant remains at the till waiting. Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma. She prepares to throw her purse to you. If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes.

At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and,*whilst it is in flight* you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes. Always remembering that until the purse had *actually been thrown* it would be plain wrong to be forward of the other shopper.

Girls - you have just learned the offside rule. It's that simple.

-Alaine
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4 comments:

Jake said...

"My first Blogger" - Who are you ? The clues are 'Someone who is associated with Marianne, who's life is stagnating, and who hasn't blogged before'. As Harry has a tendency to blog using other peoples' passwords, the 'hasn't bloged before' bit is a little hard. The 'life is stagnating' bit surely could refer to any of the Newcastle Roff's...

Is this Alaine? Anyway, I love that explanation, as I have NEVER been able to explain the offside rule to any of the girls I have taught - But now I can. THANKYOU.

9:02 am
Jake said...

Annika, how cool are we, checking the Blog as soon as we get up at 9.01am at the same time. And I think if getting the shoes was the most important part of the lesson, then yes, I think the whole thing was aimed at you.

9:05 am
grant said...

Here's the thing: if the author of this blog was Stuart, the joke would be sexist and demeaning to women. If the author of the blog is, on the other hand, Alaine, the joke is just funny. Don't ask me to explain this: it's just the way things work.

6:08 pm
adam said...

I note Marianne's comment "Alaine's plans seem to have stagnated as acommodation in Sydney is not as clean, roomy and free as home."

So I have added Alaines name to the post. Welcome to the fold Lainey!

Do me a favour and use your own login? Type in alainemaryroff and then your password at http://www.blogger.com.

If you have forgotten your password go to
http://www.blogger.com/forgot.g and put your email address in. It will gove you an opportunity to make up a new one by sending you a weblink to your email.

Then you can post pictures and your posts won't come out all funny. This is all at http://roffreport.blogspot.com/2005/10/roff-report-instructions.html but which Roff reads instructions anyway? Particularly Stuart Roff's.

12:05 am

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