New Cat

Nick
4. Scratching Luke with a consequent cat flinging.

Armidale News

The Watersforddown Affair - Thanks Ash
Luke - Hungry Head near Urunga
Nick and Fan Club
Amy wins $200 worth of shopping vouchers!

Have not blogged for some time so here is what has happened

Jenny had a birthday party. We played How to Host a Murder. Jenny received this as a present from Ashley about 15 years ago. It was great fun!

Cal and Luke are both playing soccer and I coach both sides. Luke's team is like a pack of African hunting dogs and has a a big intimidation factor.

Amy is playing hockey, Jenny is the coach, and she also recently was second for singing in the Armidale eisteddfod in the 10 division and highly commended in the 12 division. She also won a talent quest at the local plaza.

Jenny and Amy are off to see Billy Elliot next weekend.

Lily is, what we used to say in the old days, "something else".

Last holidays we camped at Urunga and it was really nice.

The 3 albums I am listening to most at present are;
1. Gone Troppo - George Harrison
2. Flesh and Blood - Roxy Music
3. The Who Sells Out - The Who

The Last 3 books I have read are

1. Yet more Penguin Science Fiction - edited by Brian Aldis
2. More Penguin Science Fiction - edited by Brian Aldis
3. Penguin Science Fiction - edited by Brian Aldis

My Favourite TV shows at present are

1. Ladette to Lady
2. Balls of Steel
3. The Footy Show

Cheers

Damian

Film review and gossip: Indiana Jones

Annika bought the tickets and Julia, Amanda, her boyfriend Mark, Dom, his mate Henry Baxter and I spent the afternoon watching Indiana Jones in the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. It was the classic 1.00pm session on Saturday afternoon and we followed it up with all-you-can-eat for $60 in Little Vietnam afterwards. Adam rang during the after-movie party and told me he HATED the movie but I really enjoyed it. It was two hours when I didn't have to think about anything else and there's great action in it. Okay, some of the escapes may be a tiny bit unbelievable but when you consider the plots of the first three movies in the series, this isn't unusual. It gets a PG rating for sex (one kiss, right at the end) but there's plenty of violence to compensate. (Note to self: don't fall over in an ants' nest in South America). I give it five stars although I'm a bit disturbed by the fact that Dr Jones is 64 and seems a little fitter than me (plus he already has his PhD).
In other breaking news, I'm off to Townsville next week for a few days to cover the Ulysses Club (Motorcyclists over 50 but you can be a junior member if you're over 40) AGM. T-shirt wearing again - I can't wait. Dom's soccer team beat the top team last week in a boilover but lost in their most recent match to the team behind them on the ladder. Dom's team (Manningham) is good if it plays to its game plan and may just get the nod this year. His strip has his name on the back and I'll get a pic as soon as possible.

There was "stack on" at the Indiana Jones after-party - I've shaved and look a bit like Adam these days...

Bollywood comes to Sydney

Whilst in India, Harry and I (and Amber and Greg) experienced an Indian traditional performance involving a Prince and a Devil-woman. The devil woman wanted to marry the prince but he refused her advances. She was relentless in her pursuit of the Prince. The Prince became fed up with the infatuation and so he chopped off the devil-woman's boobs. She got the point.

A week later we were having dinner and I noticed a poster of the Prince from the performance. Harry, in all his wisdom and confidence, bet me that I couldn't carry the poster all the way home to Sydney without folding it (except for the 2 small creases that already existed) or rolling it. It was slightly bigger than me.

A month later, and several buses, taxis, trains, rickshaws, motorbikes and planes later, the Prince and I returned to Sydney in one piece. He even got me bumped up to business class from Mumbai. My prize for winning the bet ... a KEG of BEER!!!

As a result, my Redfern household and I hosted a Bollywood party. The night was a success with everyone getting into the theme.

I loved India and recommend it to everyone who wants or needs a culture shock.

All the ladies

I tried not to like these guys but they nailed it with this track. Peace.

A light on the hill

Julia and I did the lighthouse loop last weekend and spent a night in one of the lighthouse accommodations. The lighthouse is right at the tip of Victoria and pokes into Bass Strait. The "short" walk in is 20 kilometres which doesn't sound much but there are plenty of hills on the route. The last 700 metres are the climb to the lighthouse itself which, if you aren't spent already, will finish you off. There are three huts on the complex where you can stay. We were in the white one directly to the right of the lighthouse on top of the hill which has sensational views of the ocean and cliffs. You have to carry all your food in but they'll provide some bedding for an extra fee. The walk out is 22 kilometres if you go via the beach and it's worth doing just for the scenery. Next time I go I'll stay two days as overnight isn't enough recovery time. Everyone visiting Melbourne should put this on their list.

Happy Mother's Day to all the family mothers and I hope at least your favourite children have managed to get in touch. Dom got up early and made eggs and coffee for Julia in bed (which meant, for a change, I didn't have to do it) and he also gave her a metre-long block of Toblerone. Julia is currently out with her mother having lunch. Norma is in the process of moving from her own place into a nursing home as it's becoming increasingly difficult for her to manage by herself. She's given us her driver's licence to hand in and her car to sell, but I'm thinking if I buy it, don't change the registered owner and keep renewing her licence, all the demerit points from cameras will be taken off HER licence, not mine. I have a nagging feeling there might be an ethical issue here but I can't quite put my finger on it...

Maisie

In the interests of equity (and because I probably, in all fairness, went over the top with Lachlan photo's on the Roff Report) here are a few recent shots of our little cutie.

It certainly makes you appreciate the lengths that some of our parents had to go to not play favourites. Glenn and Sue did a great job convincing Nome and I that we were seen as equals in their eyes. The way that Golden girl Kate was loved and adored hasn't affected the confidence or personalities of Zac and Liz. And Grant's children have turned out alright despite his love for Bonnie.

Armidale nights

I'm just back from a quick ride up to Armidale for the 30th reunion of the University of New England Motorcycle Club. I caught up with the Damian Roffs just in time to watch Cal play in a rugby tournament at Tas where Glenn worked for a while. Glenn and Sue actually passed through Armidale earlier in the week on their way back from Canberra and spent a night there. Cal had a solid game but didn't see too much of the ball as he was, I think, playing outside centre. His team won the four games they had and were playing in a final the following day. Damian has promised to post the results. For those of you with an Armidale background, we stayed at Tats - $25 a night which included breakfast. The town's as lovely as ever. It could be my last ride for a while as it looks like I'll be having a 12 month separation from my licence courtesy of a 45km/h-plus over-the-limit speed camera picture. I'm getting some legal advice tomorrow which should be interesting. The suspension doesn't start until May 15 which allows for one last Kombi adventure: Julia and I, along with two mates, are going to Wilson's Prom on the weekend and will do the lighthouse walk which includes an overnight stay in one of the nicest places in Australia. I'll take the camera...

From Little Things Big Things Grow

Hi everybody. Some friends of mine in a band called The Herd helped put this together with the Paul Kelly and Kev Carmody. The plan is to raise some money for the GetUp reconcilliation campaign and to make this track number one on the Australian charts.

I feel bad asking my my family to buy stuff on the family blog but it's a great track and it only costs $1.69. Click on the video for a teaser and follow the link to the site if you are interested.



Everything is good here in Sydney. I'm busily writing up my thesis so I've cancelled all social engagements for the next few months. I'm trying to do some exercise and managed to fit a surf in today, which helps the body and the soul. I'm planning to finish by Spetember and fly to Berlin with Monica for a bender, I mean a conference.

Monica was glad for the birthday wishes. We went to a teppenyakki restraunt for her birthday dinner with 30 buddies. The chef made it very special by pelting her new silk dress with uncooked eggs, but it was generally a success.

I'll level with you, the truth is I am really just sitting here waiting for Grand Theft Auto IV to be launched next Tuesday. It's hard to explain the significance of this game to non-gamers. You'll read about the strippers and the violence in the mainstream press over the next week or two, but there is so much more to it.

You play as this character Niko Bellic, an Eastern European attempting to escape his past and the horrors of the Bosnian war. He arrives in New York city and, like so many famous New York immigrant stories, he is looking for the American dream. But nothing is easy on the mean streets of New York and he gets caught up in the death throes of American organized crime. You do kill people, playing as Niko, but it's damaging to the characters state of mind. He unravels as all the violence of his old life return to haunt him on the streets of New York.

I know it sound funny to tell you about the story of a computer game, but there is a new level of sophistication in the characters and the game world that has changed how we look at games. Game developers attract some of the finest writers, actors and artists in the world. Over 200 songs are on the soundtrack, and you listen to them while driving around the city or hanging in bars, there's even a few Bob Dylan songs.

I kid you not, they have mapped every building in New York for this game. If you know the city you can drive to your old neighbourhood and pull up at your old house. If it was a dodgy neighbourhood there will be hobos around, and kids stealing apples, and crazies having arguments. If you lived in a flash suburb there will be business people scurrying out of the rain with newspapers over their heads. The whole city is alive and you are pacing the streets. You can go to a comedy club dowtown, for example, and find Ricky Gervais doing a stand-up routine, and it's new material! The only things they have changed help you drive cars faster, which has to be a good thing.

Finally, you can play games like 'cops and robbers' with other people over the internet in this living world. You have to talk to other over headsets, over the internet, and work as a team if you want to catch the robbers. Uhhh... anyway. I really digressed badly. Back to work.

Seages

The Seages were meandering through Oxford today - was great to catch up, and Sar and I have identified Adam and Tanya as quietly on track to take the title for most unruly cousins at Christmas this year.
Later on after they left we were talking - Xav said something, I said something... it got a bit out of hand, and had to be settled the only way these things can get settled.
I would like it recorded in the permanent records of the Roff Report that I was victorious 4-3.

Aunty Betty Seage

Brother and sister, Neil Roff and Betty Seage, share a birthday today. We got a card recently from Aunty Betty which I'll reproduce below as it would take her a long time to hand-write the news contained to all members of the family. Happy birthday, Aunty Betty.
"My writing is going from bad to worse - perhaps I'd do better with the pen in my mouth - I do so admire the foot-and-mouth painters. We've lost a couple of relations lately whom you've met in years gone by if I remember rightly. Noel and Pam Newton were your Godparents (Grant's Godparents), was it not so? Pam stopped in the other afternoon being in the vicinity and feeling pretty low having lost her eldest son Noel to the "big C" in recent weeks. Martin offered to drive us down to (can't read this town) near Bundanoon but I had the wrong Monday and Martin couldn't go on the right one being in China where Neil is most of the time these days with petrol problems. I can't go anywhere Monday, Wednesday and Friday with my dialysis and Tony and Mahle were on a cruise to New Zealand. I expected him to be hanging over the rails all the way and all the way back but he was only ill for a short time and enjoyed the rest of the holiday so much that he's taking Matt in May if a home can be found for Buddy, a dear little fox terrier who expects to be taken for a walk 24/7.
Our second casualty was Marie's (Ken's sister who lives in Brussles) husband, Andre, who was taken to hospital much against his will and died the next day. Marie could only attend the church service as she had to go into hospital herself to have cement injected into her lower vertibraes. Marie is still in hospital but Ken rings her every few days and she's going well. She'll be allowed home in the near future with a carer, driver, meals-on-wheels and the rest of it. Martin and family are off to the UK on thursday to visit Olga and Claude (Jenny's parents). We are off to Port Douglas on Sunday - our dialysis machines are brought up to the hospital there. Ken can never get away being my carer and will shoot me if I wake up dead before Sunday morning. Lots of love to all the family."
Aunty Betty loves getting family news so, presuming she and Uncle Ken get back alive from the dialysis tour, send her a card or letter telling her what's going on (including photos) to Lourdes Retirement Village, Unit 23, 95 Stanhope Road, Killara 2071.

Lawyers, Guns and Money

I didn't hit the drink too hard last night so I'm able to get up (reasonably) early this morning and write a quick blog about my life.

The non-interesting stuff includes the fact that I drive a 1981 Mercedes 200 with full leather interior, I live in Leichhardt about 150 metres away from Shane & Jane, about 500 metres from Peter & Vanessa and the name of my local hotel is "The Gladstone Park". God only knows why: I haven't seen a Gladstone Park anywhere nearby. But by that logic, if I drank at the Duke of Wellington I should expect to find him propped up at the bar with a glass of Sherry in hand. And that would just be ridiculous. Everyone knows he drank Pimms.

The interesting stuff mainly revolves around my work as a solicitor. The bulk of the stuff I do is criminal and I've appeared before nearly every Judge in Sydney. Often as a lawyer. I've represented people in AVO proceedings, bail applications and liqour license appeals just to name a few. Some of the firm's clients since I've been there have included (in)famous characters, such as:
(a) The two blokes who attempted to rob a bank while the local police SWAT team were in the coffee shop next door having their monthly lunch; and
(b) The man who stabbed his ex-wife's lover 37 times, then cut off his penis and shoved 'it' into his ex-wife's bedside chest of drawers.

My favourite story, though, involves the end of my first week. I was the only solicitor in the office that day and my boss said on the phone that morning: "Oh, Daniel, I didn't get a chance to tell you last night, but you'll be doing a bail application in between your other jobs. Make sure you get $1500 cash from the bloke's father. No cheques." So in rolls the bloke's father in a wheelchair. With a cheque.

After a heated argument we came to an arrangement where he guaranteed me the money covered by the cheque would be in his account by 4pm and he could then take out the cash from an ATM. Somewhat satisfied I made the application, was unsuccessful (for reasons largely beyond my control) and then made the bloke go down to an ATM to draw out the cash. He could only access $1000 at the first one, so I made him go to a second ATM.

While we were at the second ATM, one of the bank staff came up to us and asked if "Everything was alright? It looks like he (pointing to me) is forcing you to take money out of your account. Are you (looking at me) extorting money from him?"

"It's OK. I'm his lawyer."

Kel's Jim Beam debut and a number one hit

As promised, Kel with the Jim Beam girls. I was just going to let Kel have a photo with them this year, but they dragged me in too..!

Photo is of my debut (and final) fashion parade with a year 12 girl who made me look shabby.

Check out Mick Siege's latest offering under the guise of 'd-railed and under siege'. He's had some time off from music, and is coming back with some fun oz rock rap! He arranged / produced / recorded / played most of the instruments. You may hear it on JJJ soon - there is interest...! http://www.myspace.com/drailedandundersiege

Been a while since we have blogged from ol Blighty. All is going well, we are in last few weeks and looking forward to dad coming although unfortunately have exams through that time so we won't be able to go clubbing together. Also looking forward to finishing some exams, having a few weeks saying goodbyes, and then getting home to find a job (well, not looking forward to that bit). Happy-sad about leaving; it has been a great couple of years, but starting to look forward to a few more solid roots and getting home to Oz and seeing everyone again. And it is not fair that Jake and Kel have exclusive use to the babysitters that live 4o yards from their house.

Was at a dinner recently at the College and was able to have a chat with Roger 'the dodger' Bannister. Great highlight.

Know it is time to come home as at the same dinner I found myself defending our p.m.'s name from another englishman who didn't think that 'Kev', as a name, carries much weight on the world political stage.... he may have had a point but still.
Have also attached a shot of Xav from last holidays. The photo was a prelude to a few issues he had at passport control on the way back in. Apparently he was an illegal immigrant - the immigration official told us he was able to refuse Xav entry to the UK, but that we were able to come through. Had visions of him being put onto the next plane by himself and doing the long haul flight back to Australia.

Monica's birthday

For those of you with really long memories, Monica and Adam are actually engaged. Doctors and other medical professionals advise against holding your breath until the actual wedding but Adam is fast running out of excuses. Let's face it: we NEED another wedding in the near future and this one would probably be held in the beautiful surrounds of Nelsons Bay. Monica is currently celebrating her 30th birthday.
Happy birthday, Mon. We have a present for you: third party insurance for your car! Hope this isn't too late...

Milly's Birthday

Great to see some new posts of the Roff Reporte. I forgot to thank the Newcastle Roff's for having us at Milly's 21st. It was awesome fun with lots of wild outfits and dancing. And Milly even paid for most of the booze, which has to be a first in the Roff family.

Click here for a video I made of the night.
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Woodlawn Races

Sue and I have just had the pleasure of hosting Stu and Marianne and John Coughlan at the annual Woodlawn Cup meeting. Great fun. And it's not true that we hide Mr and Mrs Kennedy on an out of the way table. Why would we be embarrassed by Stuart's behaviour? We invited Marianne to judge fashions but in a very humble way Marianne suggested she wasn't classy enough - what rubbish! And she looked great. Stu was nominated in the 'Most Colourful' category but no Roff..er..er..Kennedy was ever going to win that. Jake & Kel had a ball, Kel winning about $60-70. Two hours into the meet she was worried about Lachie and Maisie. By race 5 she thought she had 2 children somewhere and that they would definitely be fine. Thank heavens for Aunty Helen. The school bus was a vital asset from the races as well as to and from the restaurant. Jake starred in the Fashion Pde and looked his usual cool self. It was a most successful event - even the rain didn't dampen spirits whilst we had a ball in the marquee. Cog was a special guest and presented the cup. Next year the meet will be held on the last weekend in March. All welcome.

Oxford Fellowship

Grant asked about the genesis of my 2009 Oxford Fellowship.Well here goes{and in part to keep the techno intolerants at bay}.With Joe and Sarah at Oxford I had planned to visit them,meet X and chat with a couple of lecturers and call it a sabbatical. When Sue went across for a 3 week visit last year Joe organised a high tea formal dinner meal for Sarah and Sue at Joe's college. With all pomp and ceremony Sarah & Sue processed past the standing students and took their places one on either side of the Master. As conversation progressed and Sue appraised the Master of Glenn's low key sabbatical plans the Master mentioned the existence of the Farrington Fellowship.Whereupon I applied. The Master wrote back apologising that it had already been taken for 2008 - would I be interested in 2009? Would I ever! The only down side is that Joe & Sar planned to be back in Australia at that time. That said, Joe may be graduating whilst Sue & I are over there. The scholarship covers fares, accomm and food. What a privilege. The multiple choice question to test your comprehension is....'Did Glenn get the scholarship because of (a) his undoubted academic skills, (b) pressure being bookended by Sue & Sarah, (c) Sue slept with the Master, (d) Joe's affiliation'.

Stuart had an interesting conversation with Glenn tonight where Glenn commented on his blogging abilities. Stuart did remind him he had only blogged once in the last two years. We head off to Lismore tomorrow for the yearly Woodlawn Cup Races where I drink a great deal of champagne with one or any of the Debras who seem to be sitting on or around the table Glenn has organised for us. Stuart and I are always in a corner where no one can see or hear us. I often wonder why. Happy birthday to Annika from all the Newcastle Roffs but do not expect to hear from too many of them. I believe Harry was last seen in Taiwan - he has not been heard of for at least 10 days so one can only assume he is alive and well. Alaine had a rather expensive drink before she returned from India via Abu Dhabi. She imbibed just a little too much in a country where alcohol is not permitted and slept through the alarm for her flight home. She then had to ring her parents to transfer money, whispering that she had drunk too much, because alcohol is not permitted in UAE, and had to pay $700 for another plane ticket home. Very expensive drink. She made it home safely and is settling back into life in Sydney. Daniel continues to enjoy his life in Leichhardt, just around the corner from Vanessa and Peter, Cairo and Victoria and Shane and Jane. We were invited to Brad's 55th birthday and to welcome Leila (Brad and Debbie's new baby) into the Forrest clan in Sydney last weekend. Because of other commitments we were unable to attend but Stuart had a great talk with Aunty Betty Forrest the night before. Milly (and Stuart and I) are over the 21st which was well attended by many colourful characters. hope all is well with the Roffs and I think many should begin clogging again. The blogs have been very slow lately except form the Melbourne side.

Marianne

Cyclone Adam

Adam has just completed a whirlwind tour of Melbourne in which he tore up the nightlife with Annika and Amanda, borrowed and trashed my motorcycle collection, taught Dominic how to live on just four hours sleep a night, helped Annika move into her new house and single-handedly took care of the house-moving reward slab. Oh, he may have also married a girl he met at the Lemmings lunch but we're still unsure if the bar manager at the Labour in Vain Hotel is a legitimate marriage celebrant. He flew back to Sydney last night (Tuesday) and all of Melbourne breathed a sigh of relief. The pictures below are of him at the Broadford motorcycle races with his new mate, Doug (not the Doug who came down with him) and Amanda's friend Jasmine's boyfriend: Nick. The other pic is of family friend David Morley and me at the same race meeting.


In other family news, Annika is in her new digs with her mate Jen. Jen's parents own the place so the landlord problem is essentially solved and it's a clean, two-bedroom town house in a nice area of her favourite suburb: Brunswick. It's an easy bicycle ride to uni and all her favourite restaurants. She's getting Aus Study assistance for the first time this year but will still need some kind of job to make ends meet.
Nick is also getting Aus Study but has endured some months of poverty waiting for the first cheque to arrive. Hopefully, it will be there as you read this and if you want to talk to him, your best bet will be Souths Leagues Club.
Julia got two tickets to "Spicks and Specs" at the Comedy Festival and we went last Sunday night. It was a ruder version of the TV show but lots of fun. The joke I liked best came from one of the contestants, Frank Woodley: "My father died peacefully in his sleep, which is more than can be said for the passengers in the car he was driving at the time."